Tuesday, July 12, 2005

A true fantasy roster

If you're a member of EWN, FW or the A1 boards, you probably noticed that each one is having (or had) a fantasy draft. Fantasy draft for fantasy wrestling... hrm, dorkiness on top of nerddom. Heh.

It's an intriguing concept though. I mean, I wouldn't be participating in the FW and A1 ones if I didn't like the idea. It all ties into your basic desires to see things the way you want to see them, with the characters you want and the feuds and all the dream matches, things you might not see in the real world of e-fedding because say Phil Banet (Big Dog's handler) doesn't have the time to do anything but A1E, or because Mike McNichols (Manson) is philosophically opposed to everything the CSWA stands for.

The drafts at both A1 and FW are both far from over, but I think I have a good roster for both to start out with so far. However, I'll save that analysis when both drafts are over. Right now, I'm going to share with you my own dream roster, without worrying about people stealing my picks!

The Main Event


Faces are so hard to come by in e-feds, seeing that everyone wants to play the heel so badly. IT's naturally easier to be a badass than it is to be something good and heroic. Well, let me rephrase that. It's easier to do the badass well than it is to be something good and heroic. Lord knows, people try to be heroes, but their writing is so pretentious that the heels have to go over. But anyway, some of these faces might not seem like faces in character, but that's alright.

The Spoiler - Sure, Dan West's landmark character was a heel for most of his MBE run, but I think he'd work well as a face just because he's the "holy shit" be-all, end-all character for the A1 feds. Of course, unless he's facing Andrew Gilkison, because how can you root against the Gilkinator?

Alias - He's one of the better new guys to come to FW that I've seen, and he's got a resume previously that is almost sterling. I think he works well as a face, in the sort of new-school way.

Beast - Another guy whom I think might be better as a heel, but his face work is strong as well. He's one of the most versatile characters around, and I think he'd be better suited as a face, seeing that there's a dearth of good main event good guys.


Troy Windham - If there's any doubt that the Slacker Windham isn't one of the greatest heels ever, read the first two NFW West shows and the latest CSWA PRIMETIME.

Hida Yakamo - He's totally an effective heel, but in a different way than Windham. While Windham is more of a "shock-jock," Hida is one of the best characters I've seen who can generate massive heel heat just from linguistics.

Shane Southern - Just because I feel bad for the guy having to retire right after he completed a BRILLIANT heel turn. I would just love to see Jason continue with the growth of his newfound heel character here.

The Upper Midcard


James Irish - He totally has the potential to break out, and someone I thought should have been the A1E Champion at Golden Dreams last year.

Boogie Smallz - He was able to take the ball and run with it in GXW, and I'd love to have him on any roster I would put together. A notch below the three I have as top faces, but still someone I'd feel comfortable holding my big title.


Lindsay Troy - She definitely has the potential to break into the World Title scene, but right now, I'd want her to be on top of the midcard to anchor the secondary title scene. I was tempted to have her go face, but I think she'd work better as the manipulative CHAIRwoman.

Professor Tremendous - My favorite Dan West character. Incredibly funny and incredibly good at getting whatever story you want to get over.



Karl Brown - This guy is headed for big things in Empire. He's a very hard worker, and he plays the British face well... probably because he is British :)

Andrew Gilkison - Andy's a very dependable character who will always give you 110%. He definitely has upward potential. He just needs to have a breakout match.

Beau Michaels - Because every fed needs a good gay guy.


Nemesys - One of my all-time favorite characters. May be a little misplaced, beacuse he can totally work the main events, but he's also great in midcard feuds too. He's here to feud with Beast at some point... one of my favorite feuds ever.

Slambo the Clown (Bill Dempsey incarnation) - I think he should have won Pier 6. Great character, and I would pair him with Prof T here.

Yori Yakamo, Jr. - YORI=AWESOME!

Futures/Low-card guys


W. Clark - I thought he should have won this first round MBE Cup match. I was totally interested to see where he was going, and I'd love to give him that chance here.

Pharaoh - Another one of my all-time favorite characters. Never really got his due.


Atkins - He's another one of Bill's characters that had great flow and a nice direction but was cut short due to whatever reason. He was a good fit in UXW and MBE:UX.

Reign - Another really good fit in UXW. It's a shame that Josh didn't have time to develop him more.

Tag Teams


Gladiator and Big Dog - For my money, the greatest e-fed Tag Team I've ever seen.

Euclid and Druid - Almost unmatched chemistry between these two guys.

The Unemployed College Students (PILE and SweetJesusFunk) - The Odd Couple of MBE.

Mikey F'n W and Liquid Snake - Dog and Gladdy may be the best team I've seen, but Mikey and Snake are my favorite team.


Chip Friendly and Jeffery Bellview - The other team that made the A1E Tag Team scene so damn fun in early 2001.

The Psycho Ward (Torment and Mr. Hyde) - Barely edging out Anarcchy Inc. because I'm a huge Hyde mark.

The Cameron Cruise Project (Joey Melton and Cameron Cruise) - Definitely the most entertaining team of hte last year or so.

The Professionals (Craig Miles and Dennis Eddie Mayfield) - Just so I can break them up and have them destroy arenas feuding :)

The best part about my tag division is that I have 10 former World Champions in there that I can just as easily insert into the singles scene as I can in an exciting and enthralling tag scene.

And there you have my dream roster. You'd totally follow that fed, wouldn't you?


James Irish said...

Not very nice of the guy above, huh?

Anyhow, thanks again for all the props. But you never answered my question from my last reply in the blog. :p

Tom Holzerman said...

I know I didn't because I was trying to find a snappy answer but I couldn't. Although maybe REAL ULTIMATE POWER has something to do with it.

*cue ominous music*

Phil said...

You know you wanted Farnsy in there. Just admit it. ;)

Anonymous said...

So, you're saying you'd push the Pros to the main event upon splitting?

::gets ready to push NFW vote button::

Adam B. said...

As his TEAM bio is written, I totally saw Boogie Smallz as a heel. I figured he would be a great entry-point nemesis for Wildchild... or maybe once he has a few matches under his belt...