Thursday, December 22, 2005

Christmas gifts!

Since I already went over what I want for Christmas, I figured now I'd tell you what I'd give certain folks for Christmas. It's a two-way street, y'know. And some people take more joy in giving than receiving.

So without further ado...

(Note, these are all "in-character" wishes)

- For Eddie Mayfield, a new X-Box 360 to replace the X-Box that mean ol' Craig Miles destroyed.

- For Michael Manson, drugs, in large doses, stat

- For Slambo the Clown, a brand new waterbug for a best friend

- For Yori Yakamo, Jr., several new (scantily clad, buxom and female, preferably) adherents to Yoriology

- For IrishRed, a DNA test to see if he is indeed Irish, because he surely hasn't gotten the luck of the Irish in tournaments this year

- For Dan Ryan, a new tie, because what do you get the man who has everything already?

- For Michael "Chainz" Sloan, a gift certificate for some therapy at Friends Hospital or any other "mental rehabilitation facility" of his choice

- For Seymour Almasy, two weeks paid vacation to the exotic, furthest away from a wrestling ring as you can find locale possible

- For Lowell Dot Com, 50 extra pounds of cellulite, because more fat means bigger sized clothing, bigger sized clothing, more area of fabric, more area of fabric... well, you see where I'm getting at here

- For Beau Michaels, the Yori Yakamo Special Edition Black Thunder 9" "Feminine Pleasure Device" *wink wink, nudge nudge*

- For Ellis Nash, a Victoria's Secret "barely there" bra, for protection against locker room intruders without the uncomfortable restraint of a regular bra

- For Poison Ivy, eyes that work

- For Cameron Cruise, a lifetime supply of light, fluffy Eggo waffles

- For Chip Friendly, someone to come along and beat Slambo for that Survivor Title so they can go after other things

- For Lindsay Troy, the Phantom of the Opera mask to cover unsightly, imitator-caused blemishes

- And finally, for the E-fedding Community as a whole, a safe, healthy New Year

2 comments:

Dan said...

Chip thanks you for his present.

Honestly, I was a bit at a loss of where to go with him until I read this.

But now I have a plan.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for the present. I am Irish...it's that damn German side that keeps getting in the way Tommy.
I was so honored to be able to face the people I did this year in tourney play.
Let's see in the MBE tourney I got to face Housefly, Cross, Paco, Hida, Spoiler, Dan Ryan...that's a pretty impressive list right there. Although I didn't win the tourney I'd like to think that was one hell of a run for anyone; no matter who the handler to make.

Then in the TEAM tourney I get that muppet kid bastard who was a lot of fun to promo against and then I get HIDA again. OH THE HUMANITY!!!

It was great.

This year in A1E I have been able to face a lot of the greats. Beast, Lindsey, Big Dog, James Irish, Anarchy, Duchess...it has been a great year and honestly my record doesn't suck that bad.

I'm just in this for the fun and the camraderie. Sure I'd love to be champion (UCW look out) but I'm having a blast just being Irishred who truly is just an extension of me.

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night...

-Shane